Ogs
By C. J. Dennis
It chanced one day, in the middle of May,
There came to the great King Splosh
A policeman, who said, while scratching his head,
"There isn't a stone in Gosh
To throw at a dog; for the crafty Og,
Last Saturday week, at one,
Took our last blue-metal, in order to settle
A bill for a toy pop-gun."
Said the King, jokingly,
"Why, how provokingly
Weird; but we have the gun."
And the King said, "Well, we are stony-broke."
But the Queen could not see it was much of a joke.
And she said, "If the metal is all used up,
Pray what of the costume I want for the Cup?
It all seems so dreadfully simple to me.
The stones? Why, import them from over the sea."
But a Glug stood up with a mole on his chin,
And said, with a most diabolical grin,
"Your Majesties, down in the country of Podge,
A spy has discovered a very 'cute dodge.
And the Ogs are determined to wage a war
On Gosh, next Friday, at half-past four."
Then the Glugs all cried, in a terrible fright,
"How did our grandfathers manage a fight?"
Then the Knight, Sir Stodge, he opened his Book,
And he read, "Some very large stones they took,
And flung at the foe, with exceeding force;
Which was very effective, tho' rude, of course."
And lo, with sorrowful wails and moans,
The Glugs cried, "Where, Oh, where are the stones?"
And some rushed North, and a few ran West;
Seeking the substitutes seeming best.
And they gathered the pillows and cushions and rugs
From the homes of the rich and middle-class Glugs.
And a hasty message they managed to send
Craving the loan of some bricks from a friend.
On the Friday, exactly at half-past four,
Came the Ogs with triumphant glee.
And the first of their stones hit poor Mister Ghones,
The captain of industry.
Then a pebble of Podge took the Knight, Sir Stodge,
In the curve of his convex vest.
He gurgled "Un-Gluggish!" His heart growing sluggish,
He solemnly sank to rest.
'Tis inconceivable,
Scarcely believable,
Yet, he was sent to rest.
And the King said, "Ouch!" And the Queen said, "0o!
My bee-ootiful drawing-room! What shall I do?"
But the warlike Ogs, they hurled great rocks
Thro' the works of the wonderful eight-day clocks
They had sold to the Glugs but a month before —
Which was very absurd; but, of course, 'twas war.
And the Glugs cried, "What would our grandfathers do
If they hadn't the stones that they one time threw?"
But the Knight, Sir Stodge, and his mystic Book
Oblivious slept in a grave-yard nook.
Then a Glug stood out with a pot in his hand,
As the King was bewailing the fate of his land,
And he said, "If these Ogs you desire to retard,
Then hit them quite frequent with anything hard."
So the Glugs seized anvils, and editors' chairs,
And smote the Ogs with them unawares;
And bottles of pickles, and clocks they threw,
And books of poems, and gherkins, and glue,
Which they'd bought with the stones — as, of course, you know —
From the Ogs but a couple of months ago.
Which was simply inane, when you reason it o'er;
And uneconomic, but then, it was war.
When they'd fought for a night and the most of a day,
The Ogs threw the last of their metal away.
Then they went back to Podge, well content with their fun,
And, with much satisfaction, declared they had won.
And the King of the Glugs gazed around on his land,
And saw nothing but stones strewn on every hand:
Great stones in the palace, and stones in the street,
And stones on the house-tops and under the feet.
And he said, with a desperate look on his face,
"There is nothing so ghastly as stones out of place.
And, no doubt, this Og scheme was a very smart dodge.
But whom does it profit — my people, or Podge?"
Poem Analysis:
The poem Ogs by C. J. Dennis is a satirical work that critiques human folly, particularly the absurdities of war, economic practices, and leadership. Through its whimsical narrative, the poem provides a sharp commentary on resource mismanagement, the cyclical nature of conflict, and the unintended consequences of greed and shortsighted decisions.
Overview of the Narrative
The poem revolves around the Glugs, a fictional people led by King Splosh and Queen Splosh. When the Glugs find themselves without stones—a crucial resource both for construction and for defense—they are faced with the threat of war from their neighbors, the Ogs. The Ogs had earlier acquired the last of the Glugs’ stones under the guise of trade, only to weaponize them against the Glugs during the ensuing conflict. The Glugs resort to throwing miscellaneous objects at their attackers, a tactic that proves wasteful and inefficient. By the end of the war, both sides are left questioning the true beneficiaries of their actions.
Satirical Themes
C. J. Dennis employs satire to address several interconnected themes:
- The Futility of War: The poem underscores the absurdity of war through the Glugs’ and Ogs’ ridiculous tactics. The Ogs, after trading for stones, use them to attack the Glugs, while the Glugs retaliate with makeshift weapons such as pickles, books, and gherkins. This highlights how war often leads to pointless destruction, with both sides expending resources and suffering losses without any real gain. The lines about the destruction of valuable possessions, such as "eight-day clocks" and other items, mock the senseless waste of war.
- Mismanagement of Resources: The Glugs’ plight begins with their failure to preserve their natural resources. The metaphor of “stones” represents essential resources that are squandered without forethought. The fact that the Glugs sold their stones to the Ogs, only to be attacked with those same stones, critiques shortsighted economic practices and the dangers of prioritizing immediate profits over long-term needs.
- Ineffectual Leadership: King Splosh and Queen Splosh symbolize ineffective leadership. The King jokes about being “stony-broke,” while the Queen dismissively suggests importing stones without considering practical implications. Their inability to foresee the consequences of their decisions reflects the failure of those in power to plan responsibly for their people's welfare.
- The Question of Progress: The poem questions the supposed progress and rationality of the Glugs, particularly in their reliance on outdated traditions as recorded in Sir Stodge's book. The Glugs’ attempts to mimic the actions of their forebears by throwing stones during battle are stymied by their own resource depletion. This critique extends to the dangers of blindly adhering to tradition without adapting to contemporary challenges.
Satirical Devices and Poetic Techniques
Dennis employs various literary devices to amplify his satire:
- Irony: The poem is steeped in irony. The Glugs’ reliance on the Ogs for resources leads to their downfall, while their improvised defense with non-lethal objects serves to ridicule the chaos and inefficiency of their response to war.
- Hyperbole: The exaggerated depiction of the Glugs’ desperate attempts to find substitutes for stones—using “editors' chairs,” “gherkin bottles,” and “books of poems”—serves as a humorous but pointed critique of disorganized problem-solving and wastefulness.
- Rhythmic Playfulness: The poem’s rhythm and rhyme lend it a light-hearted, almost nursery-rhyme quality, which contrasts sharply with its serious themes. This juxtaposition enhances the satire, as the seemingly trivial tone underscores the absurdity of the events.
- Allegory: While the story appears whimsical, it functions as an allegory for real-world issues, including imperialistic trade practices, environmental exploitation, and the self-destructive nature of unchecked greed and conflict.
Symbolism in the Poem
- Stones: Stones symbolize foundational resources necessary for stability and security. The Glugs’ careless depletion of their stones reflects humanity’s overuse of natural resources and the consequences of irresponsible trade.
- Sir Stodge’s Book: The Knight and his book represent blind adherence to tradition and outdated strategies. The Glugs’ reliance on this ineffective guide highlights the dangers of refusing to innovate in the face of changing circumstances.
- The Ogs: The Ogs symbolize opportunism and exploitation. Their cunning maneuver to acquire stones under the guise of trade, only to use them as weapons, mirrors real-world instances of economic and military exploitation.
Modern Relevance
Despite its whimsical tone and fictional setting, Ogs resonates with modern audiences due to its universal themes. The depletion of resources parallels contemporary environmental issues, while the cyclical nature of conflict reflects ongoing geopolitical struggles. The poem also critiques the short-term thinking and mismanagement often exhibited by those in power, making it a timeless reminder of the consequences of greed and poor governance.
C. J. Dennis’s Ogs is a masterful satire that uses humor and absurdity to critique serious issues. Through the plight of the Glugs, Dennis warns against the dangers of resource mismanagement, the futility of war, and the failure of leadership. The poem’s playful tone belies its profound message, encouraging readers to reflect on the consequences of their actions and the systems they support. As a piece of literary art, it serves as both entertainment and a sharp societal critique, cementing its place as a thought-provoking work of satire.