The Play
By C. J. Dennis
"Wots in a name?" she sez...An' then she sighs,
An' clasps 'er little 'ands, an' rolls 'er eyes.
"A rose," she sez, "be any other name
Would smell the same.
Oh, w'erefore art you Romeo, young sir?
Chuck yer ole pot, an' change yer moniker!"
Doreen an' me, we bin to see a show —
The swell two-dollar touch. Bong tong, yeh know.
A chair apiece wiv velvit on the seat;
A slap-up treat.
The drarmer's writ be Shakespeare, years ago,
About a barmy goat called Romeo.
"Lady, be yonder moon I swear!" sez 'e.
An' then 'e climbs up on the balkiney;
An' there they smooge a treat, wiv pretty words
Like two love-birds.
I nudge Doreen. She whispers, "Ain't it grand!"
'Er eyes is shinin'; an' I squeeze 'er 'and.
"Wot's in a name?" she sez. 'Struth, I dunno.
Billo is just as good as Romeo.
She may be Juli-er or Juli-et —
'E loves 'er yet.
If she's the tart 'e wants, then she's 'is queen,
Names never count...But ar, I like "Doreen!"
A sweeter, dearer sound I never 'eard;
Ther's music 'angs around that little word,
Doreen!...But wot was this I starts to say
About the play?
I'm off me beat. But when a bloke's in love
'Is thorts turns 'er way, like a 'omin' dove.
This Romeo 'e's lurkin' wiv a crew —
A dead tough crowd o' crooks — called Montague.
'Is cliner's push — wot's nicknamed Capulet —
They 'as 'em set.
Fair narks they are, jist like them back-street clicks,
Ixcep' they fights wiv skewers 'stid o' bricks.
Wot's in a name? Wot's in a string o' words?
They scraps in ole Verona with the'r swords,
An' never give a bloke a stray dog's chance,
An' that's Romance.
But when they deals it out wiv bricks an' boots
In Little Lon., they're low, degraded broots.
Wot's jist plain stoush wiv us, right 'ere to-day,
Is "valler" if yer fur enough away.
Some time, some writer bloke will do the trick
Wiv Ginger Mick,
Of Spadger's Lane. 'E'LL be a Romeo,
When 'e's bin dead five 'undred years or so.
Fair Juli-et, she gives 'er boy the tip.
Sez she: "Don't sling that crowd o' mine no lip;
An' if you run agin a Capulet,
Jist do a get."
'E swears 'e's done wiv lash; 'e'll chuck it clean.
(Same as I done when I first met Doreen.)
They smooge some more at that. Ar, strike me blue!
It gimme Joes to sit an' watch them two!
'E'd break away an' start to say good-bye,
An' then she'd sigh
"Ow, Ro-me-o!" an' git a strangle-holt,
An' 'ang around 'im like she feared 'e'd bolt.
Nex' day 'e words a gorspil cove about
A secret wedding; 'an they plan it out.
'E spouts a piece about 'ow 'e's bewitched:
Then they git 'itched.
Now, 'ere's the place where I fair git the pip!
She's 'is ofr keeps, an' yet 'e lets 'er slip!
Ar! but'e makes me sick! A fair gazob!
'E's jist the glarsey on the soulful sob,
'E'll sigh and spruik, an' 'owl a love-sick vow —
(The silly cow!)
But when 'e's got 'er, spliced an' on the straight
'E crools the pitch, an' tries to kid it's Fate.
Aw! Fate me foot! Instid of slopin' soon
As 'e was wed, off on 'is 'oneymoon,
'Im an' 'is cobber, called Mick Curio,
They 'ave to go
An' mix it wiv that push o' Capulets.
They look fer trouble; an' it's wot they gets.
A tug named Tyball (cousin to the skirt)
Sprags 'em an' makes a start to sling off dirt.
Nex' minnit there's a reel ole ding-dong go —
'Arf round or so.
Mick Curio, 'e gets it in the neck,
"Ar rats!" 'e sez, an' passes in 'is check.
Quite natchril, Romeo gits wet as 'ell.
"It's me or you!" 'e 'owls, an' wiv a yell,
Plunks Tyball through the gizzard wiv 'is sword,
'Ow I ongcored!
"Put in the boot!" I sez. "Put in the boot!"
"'Ush!" sez Doreen..."Shame!" sez some silly coot.
Then Romeo, 'e dunno wot to do.
The cops gits busy, like they allwiz do,
An' nose around until 'e gits blue funk
An' does a bunk.
They wants 'is tart to wed some other guy.
"Ah, strike!" she sez. "I wish that I could die!"
Now, this 'ere gorspil bloke's a fair shrewd 'ead.
Sez 'e "I'll dope yeh, so they'll THINK yer dead."
(I tips 'e was a cunnin' sort, wot knoo
A thing or two.)
She takes 'is knock-out drops, up in 'er room:
They think she's snuffed, an' plant 'er in 'er tomb.
Then things gits mixed a treat an' starts to whirl.
'Ere's Romeo comes back an' finds 'is girl
Tucked in 'er little coffing, cold an' stiff,
An' in a jiff,
'E swallows lysol, throws a fancy fit,
'Ead over turkey, an' 'is soul 'as flit.
Then Juli-et wakes up an' sees 'im there,
Turns on the water-works an' tears 'er 'air,
"Dear love," she sez, "I cannot live alone!"
An' wiv a moan,
She grabs 'is pockit knife, an' ends 'er cares...
"Peanuts or lollies!" sez a boy upstairs.
Poem Analysis:
C. J. Dennis’s poem “The Play” is a humorous and uniquely Australian retelling of Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet, as experienced by a working-class narrator and his girlfriend, Doreen. Written in a stylized Australian vernacular, Dennis blends parody and affection, using the iconic tragedy to reflect on themes of love, identity, class, and the nature of storytelling itself.
Dennis doesn’t just summarize Shakespeare’s play — he filters it through the eyes of an Aussie larrikin (a cheeky, streetwise man), blending reverence and ridicule in a richly comic narrative that both critiques and celebrates romantic drama.
Tone and Style
The tone is colloquial, irreverent, and warm-hearted. Dennis uses a distinctly Australian idiom throughout, mimicking the working-class speech patterns of early 20th-century Melbourne. Words like “cliner,” “cobber,” “spruik,” and phrases like “strike me blue” give the poem its unmistakable voice.
The poem is also written in rhyming couplets, which adds to its musicality and comedic rhythm, mirroring the lighthearted storytelling of the narrator.
Narrative Structure
The poem unfolds as a monologue by a man who has taken his girl, Doreen, to a fancy theater production of Romeo and Juliet. He describes the events of the play in his own slang, interjecting personal reflections and opinions — often coarse but tender — especially about love and about Doreen.
There are two narratives running in parallel:
- The retelling of Romeo and Juliet – condensed, satirized, and translated into Aussie street lingo.
- The narrator’s relationship with Doreen – sincere, affectionate, and used to contrast Shakespeare’s tragic drama.
Major Themes
1. Love and Identity: What’s in a Name?
The poem opens with Juliet’s famous line:
“Wots in a name?” she sez...An’ then she sighs,
The narrator reflects on this question earnestly, comparing the high drama of Shakespeare’s characters with his own modest love for Doreen. His conclusion?
“Names never count...But ar, I like ‘Doreen!’”
Where Juliet wrestles with familial identity and forbidden love, the narrator affirms that love doesn’t care about labels — yet still finds something beautiful in the name of his own beloved.
2. Class and Cultural Distance
Dennis cleverly contrasts Shakespeare’s “Romance” with the gritty reality of working-class life. The Capulets and Montagues brawl with swords in Verona, while street gangs in Little Lon fight with bricks and boots. The narrator draws attention to the hypocrisy of romanticizing upper-class violence while condemning lower-class roughness:
“Wot’s jist plain stoush wiv us, right ‘ere to-day,Is ‘valler’ if yer fur enough away.”
This is a biting critique of class bias in literature and society: violence is noble when it’s fictional or aristocratic, but shameful when it's real and poor.
3. The Comic Tragedy of High Drama
The narrator frequently mocks the overwrought behavior of Romeo:
“Ar! but 'e makes me sick! A fair gazob!'E's jist the glarsey on the soulful sob…”
He finds Romeo’s melodrama laughable, especially compared to his own practical love for Doreen. But he’s also moved — “it gimme Joes” (made him cry) — and this blend of ridicule and emotional sincerity is one of Dennis’s finest comic strategies. It acknowledges that love stories, however grand or silly, always touch the human heart.
4. Satire of Storytelling and Legacy
In one of the most reflective passages, the narrator predicts that, in time, even rough Aussie blokes like “Ginger Mick” from Spadger’s Lane could be immortalized in verse:
“Some time, some writer bloke will do the trickWiv Ginger Mick,Of Spadger's Lane. ‘E’LL be a Romeo,When ‘e’s bin dead five ‘undred years or so.”
This is both a jab at Shakespeare’s canonization and a celebration of the idea that every ordinary person’s life — no matter how humble — could become epic if told with heart and imagination.
Humor and Irony
The poem’s humor arises from its contrasts:
- The lofty Shakespearean language vs. Aussie slang.
- The grand, tragic stakes of the play vs. the simple, sincere love between the narrator and Doreen.
- High culture vs. street culture.
The line “Peanuts or lollies!” sez a boy upstairs immediately after Juliet’s suicide is a perfect example of Dennis undercutting melodrama with comic realism — showing how high tragedy meets everyday distractions.
C. J. Dennis’s “The Play” is a masterful blend of parody, critique, and affection. By translating Romeo and Juliet into the idiom of early 20th-century Australian working-class culture, Dennis democratizes Shakespeare, making the story accessible and relatable without losing its emotional core.
Behind the humor lies a sincere meditation on love, identity, and the value of every human story — not just those told in velvet-draped theaters, but those lived in backstreets, whispered in slang, and felt in ordinary hearts.
In the end, the poem isn’t just about Romeo and Juliet. It’s about Dennis and Doreen. And for all his sarcasm, the narrator teaches us that real love — the kind that isn’t swamped by fate or feuds — lives not on stage, but in everyday, enduring affection.